Monday, March 31, 2008

[insert cheesy, nostalgic entry title here]

Today's officially the last day of business for Barnes & Noble's Chelsea location, store #2538. I spent way too long there, but I still have a soft spot for the old place. I also hate it with an unyielding passion.

That's why I'm having such a blast with Alex Robinson's graphic novel Box Office Poison. Now that I have the distance I need from my experience at the store, I can read this and truly appreciate the protagonist's self-satisfying stagnation as a bookseller making minimum wage. Because seriously, who's ever really stuck at a shitty job like that unless deep down they just want to have something to complain about? Sure, my former coworkers and I were "afraid" to leave and thus forfeit those $7 an hour and benefits, but didn't we all get off just a little on complaining about the Dragon Lady in the green [insert: manager's] room?

Plus, we got to work with the lecherous and creepy gay priest. "Lech" really is the word. His frock was off-white, too. More of a cream color. I really ought to Ghost World him soon. [Think of the satanists in the supermarket and you'll understand what I mean]

There will be an in-store potluck after closing. As a former employee, I've been invited, uninvited, and un-uninvited due to what the regional bigwigs call "liability issues." In that case, maybe I'll smash a PDT scanner into an empty display case, just for a laugh.

Which reminds me of a fantasy I had that, if I were still working there on the final day, we'd chase the customers out of the store while brandishing PDTs and destroying displays and fixtures, sweeping a table or two, and ultimately imploding the building before skipping arm in arm, naked, around the smoldering ruins.

Let's see what happens at 6pm.

1 comment:

Meghann Wilhoite said...

I love the unyielding passion sentence. delicious!